A Musical Face

"If you were a Broadway musical, people would be humming your face."
Elliot Garfield (Richard Dreyfuss), The Goodbye Girl

Pillow Notes

"I can't stand little notes on my pillow. "We're all out of cornflakes. F.U." Took me three hours to figure out F.U. was Felix Ungar!"
Oscar Madison (Walter Matthau), The Odd Couple

A Male Gene

"Funny's a male gene, you idiot. Haven't you ever noticed whenever you see a really funny girl, she's a little mannish? Think about it. Lily Tomlin, Ellen DeGeneres, Rosie O'Donnell..."

Doc (Jerry Stiller), The Heartbreak Kid (Widescreen Edition)

The Worst Kind of Romantic

"You're worse than a hopeless romantic. You're a hopeful one."
Hannah Warren (Jane Fonda), California Suite